You might be a redneck nerd if...

  1. If yer computer stand is made of a stack of old tires or 2 x 8's and cinderblocks.
  2. Ya think www. in a url is a logo for a wrestlin' organization.
    Someone tells ya they're "locked up" and ya ask if they need bail money.
  3. Ya've ever been too drunk to chat.
  4. Ya think a hard drive is a trip to Uncle Bubba's.
  5. Yer mouse keeps knocking over yer spitcan.
  6. Ya think a surge supressor is a pill for diarrhea.
  7. Ya keep trying to figure out why yer scanner won't pick up police radio calls.
  8. Ya think a megabyte is a new sandwich at McDonalds.
  9. Ya have to ask someone how to spell LOL.
  10. Yer stomach overlaps half of yer keyboard.
  11. Ya try to figure out how to get yer empty beer cans into the recyclin' bin.
  12. Ya try to figure out how yer floppy disk got hard.
  13. When birds fly across yer screen an ya reach for yer shotgun.
  14. Ya put a mousetrap on yer desk.
  15. Yer yards full of ol' computers stacked on cinder blocks.
  16. Ya call tech support an ask where ta buy stamps fer yer e-mail.
  17. When ya tern yer computer on ya say, "Come OOOOOOON Betsy."
  18. Ya think system wizard is a dude in a funny hat. (He is!)
  19. Ya think 64 M RAM is a nu big block engine fer yer pickup.
  20. Ya think ICQ is how smert yer computer is.
  21. Someone tellz ya yer computer has a bug an ya reach for the can of Raid.
  22. Ya think a mouse pad iz where Mighty Mouse and his cousins hang.
  23. Ya go buy a surfboard to surf the net.
  24. Ya think MB stands for "More Beer."
  25. Ya wait fer the bluelight special at K-Mart ta buy yer puter.
  26. Ya see the word Download, and take the shells out of yer shotgun.
  27. Ya think the person that made yer keyboard was dumb cuz the letters aint in order.
  28. Ya think CD stands for Cow Dung.
  29. Ya think IBM stands for "Idn't Betsy Marvelous."
  30. Ya think GIF stands fer "Goodie It's Free."
  31. Ya think Mirabilis is a new brand of smokes.
  32. Ya see the "shift" key and try ta figure out how ta change gears.
  33. Ya put a quilt over yer screen when a make whoopee to yer ol' lady.
  34. Ya think screen saver is a new flavor o' candy.
  35. Ya think Geocities is a place ta buy lil cars.
  36. Ya think the "A drive" is where ya park yer pickup.
  37. Ya see the word "Zip" and know why youz feelin' a draft.
  38. Yer puter has a bumper sticker on it.
  39. Part of yer puter is held together with duct tape.
  40. Ya sees the word "Refresh" and reach into the cooler fer another beer.
  41. You sees the word "Website" and start looking for spiders.