You’re definitely a redneck if...

1.  You wake up with both a black eye and a hickey.

2.  You don't think Jeff Foxworthy's jokes are funny. :)

3.  Bikers back down from your mama opening a beer bottle.

4.  You've ever vacationed in a rest area.

5.  You hold a frog and it worries about getting warts.

6.  The Orkin man tells you "Give up.  You've lost".

7.  You can burp the entire chorus of "Jingle Bells".

8.  People are scared to touch your bathrobe.

9.  You've ever stolen a bulldozer.

10. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree at the corner.

11. You date your first cousin and think she is the best lay you will ever have.

12. You have jars in your garage filled with stuff the FBI won’t identify!

13. Your yard has ever been a landfill.

14. You’ve ever been the first person in and the last person out of a video arcade on the same day.

15. Your dog can chew Red Man!

16. You wake up with Red Man in your hair.

17. You keep catfish in your aquarium.

18. Your dog rides in the front seat and your kids ride in the back.

19. When you talk about great mullet fishermen, Granny’s name always comes up.

20. You have orange road cones in your living room.

21. You get Odor-Eaters as a Christmas present... and like it!

22. Your mother doesn’t put on shoes to go grocery shopping.

23. You walk into a restaurant with a toothpick in your mouth.

24. You have to hold off scheduling the family reunion till after the parole board meets.

25. You know more Redneck jokes than this!